Relationship Education in Schools Debate

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Department: Department for Education
Tuesday 1st April 2025

(3 days, 6 hours ago)

Westminster Hall
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Helen Maguire Portrait Helen Maguire
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It is vital that we start to address what is going on with social media, as we have been calling for. The social media tech giants have to take on that responsibility.

One in four women and one in six men will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime, and domestic abuse starts young: those aged 16 to 19 are the most likely to experience it. We need to focus on prevention to stop this at the root. Sadly, my Epsom and Ewell constituency has felt the devastating reality of violence against women and girls far too acutely in recent years, and the impact on families, friends, students and entire school communities has been profound.

Let us be clear, however, that violence against women and girls extends beyond my community; it is a national epidemic. In January, the National Audit Office reported that one in 12 women are victims of gender-based violence each year. Despite the increasing political attention, sexual assault rates among women aged 16 to 59 rose from 3.4% in 2009-10 to 4.3% in 2023-24. A key issue is that prevention has been an afterthought rather than a priority. That must change.

Anna Dixon Portrait Anna Dixon (Shipley) (Lab)
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I thank the hon. Lady for securing this important debate. I serve on the Public Accounts Committee, which looked at the NAO report on violence against women and girls. In West Yorkshire, the police have developed a brilliant prevention programme —the hon. Lady touched on the need for prevention—called Pol-Ed, which goes into schools and teaches young people, both boys and girls, about some of the danger signs around spiking and inappropriate imagery, as well as about consent. Does she agree that it is important to educate children, both on prevention—what the danger signs are and what an unhealthy relationship is—and on what a healthy relationship looks like?

Helen Maguire Portrait Helen Maguire
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I thank the hon. Member for that intervention; it is absolutely key to understand both, and to understand what the signs of an unhealthy relationship could be. We need to stop treating violence against women and girls as something that can be addressed only after the fact—after a woman has been assaulted, coerced, or has lost her life. We need to act before it happens, and that starts with education and empowering our young people with the knowledge of what a healthy relationship is.

The recent Netflix series, “Adolescence”, has brought national attention to the dangers facing young people today. It follows a 13-year-old boy accused of murdering a female classmate, sparking difficult but necessary conversations about online misogyny and extremist online communities. Teachers and parents are struggling to keep up with the ever-evolving nature of those threats. Teachers need greater support to tackle these issues in schools. Too often, they are simply ill-equipped and unprepared to teach relationships, sex and health education. Fifty per cent of pupils reported that power imbalances and pornography were not covered in their lessons, and 56% said that what a healthy relationship looks like was not covered either. Surely that should be absolutely key.

Incels, the red pill and the manosphere are relatively new terms, but the attitudes that they promote are not new. It is sexism and male chauvinism repackaged for the digital age, amplified and spread faster than ever before. That is why we must ensure that our education system evolves to counteract this harmful narrative before it takes root in young minds.

The Centre for Social Justice’s latest report, “Lost Boys”, highlights that boys in the UK are struggling in education, more likely to take their own lives, less likely to find stable employment and more susceptible to being drawn into crime. It also notes the increasing appeal of right-wing and regressive ideologies among young men. We must address the core challenges that our young men face and understand how misogyny is evolving, educating parents, teachers and, most importantly, young people themselves—we need to support them.

A whole-school approach is essential in addressing these issues effectively. This approach encourages schools to review their existing procedures and culture, to ensure that they model respectful relationships and gender equality practices across the entire school community. By embedding those values into the fabric of the school environment, we create a culture that actively challenges harmful stereotypes and promotes positive, healthy relationships. Yet last year, we saw the RSHE review become unnecessarily politicised and hijacked by sensationalist headlines and anti-LGBTQ+ rhetoric, serving only to fuel division. We cannot afford to play politics with the health, safety and wellbeing of our children. The focus of any review of RSHE should be on how we can equip young people with the knowledge and tools that they need to navigate the modern world safely. It should address the urgent need to tackle the rise of online misogyny, the increasing prevalence of violence against women and girls, and the damaging impact of pornography and exploitative media on young people’s perceptions of relationships.

I recently heard from a young constituent, Maddie, who is here today. She was deeply affected by the loss of a teacher in our community and wrote to me expressing her frustration that while the conversation on violence against women and girls often focuses on policing and reporting, prevention is often overlooked. She told me how her cousin, a newly qualified teacher, was asked to deliver RSHE lessons despite feeling completely unprepared to do so. She is right to be frustrated. Young people overwhelmingly support strong education on relationships, with 87% saying that there should be more teaching about relationships, abuse and sexual health. We owe it to them to listen.

RSHE is often an afterthought, added in as an extra and delivered by teachers who are not specifically trained for it. Many are simply given a sheet of paper to read from and do not know how to answer the follow-up questions. That is why I am calling for urgent reforms to RSHE, including: updating the outdated 2019 guidance to reflect the realities of young people’s lives today; extending RSHE up to key stage 5 so that it reaches 16 to 18-year-olds; making RSHE a key component of initial teacher training, ensuring that new teachers are properly equipped to deliver it; and investing in training for school leaders, teachers and governors to understand the online spaces that young people navigate today.

We cannot afford to wait until another young woman becomes a statistic. We must act now to equip the next generation with the knowledge and resilience that they need to build safe, healthy relationships. Teaching children about harmful gender stereotypes, consent, respect and healthy peer relationships from the earliest stages is key to preventing violence against women and girls. I urge the Government to prioritise prevention, invest in education and listen to the voices of our young people who are asking us for change. The time for action is now.

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Joe Morris Portrait Joe Morris (Hexham) (Lab)
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It is a pleasure to serve under your chairship for the second time this afternoon, Sir Jeremy. I thank the hon. Member for Epsom and Ewell (Helen Maguire) for securing this important debate. A couple of weeks ago, at Prime Minister’s questions, my hon. Friend the Member for Knowsley (Anneliese Midgley) noted the significance of “Adolescence”, the series produced by Stephen Graham and starring Christine Tremarco that I think has touched all hon. Members. I strongly support my hon. Friend’s call for screenings in schools. It is crucial to spark conversation, education and urgent change around online male radicalisation, and violence against women and girls. Like, I hope, everyone in this Chamber, I was assured and pleased by the Prime Minister’s response.

I recognise that a real and abhorrent problem is being perpetuated in our society. We are experiencing an epidemic of gender-based violence. We have had a disjointed approach to tackling that epidemic, and that approach has failed. We have failed to protect women and girls from violence, failed to improve outcomes for victims and failed to combat deep-rooted sexism and misogyny across the UK. Instead, I see from my casework an increase in peer-on-peer abuse cases in primary and secondary schools.

Schools should be safe spaces and provide a secure environment for children to learn—places that parents should feel comfortable sending their children. We need to ensure that safeguarding is in place to ensure that protection. Children going to school and experiencing abuse is despicable and inexcusable. We need to urgently look at how we address these issues, and the curriculum must ensure that exposure to social media and online platforms providing violent, misogynistic, racist and homophobic content can be properly countered.

I want to briefly mention the family of Holly Newton—a constituent of mine who was tragically murdered by her former boyfriend—who campaign tirelessly to raise awareness around recognising signs of domestic abuse. I associate myself with the calls from Holly’s mum for lowering the age that teenagers can be considered domestic abuse victims. When I look out my office window on Beaumont Street in Hexham, there is a wonderful installation of ribbons dedicated to victims of domestic abuse, with a single ribbon for Holly of a different colour, to emphasise that she is not counted in those statistics. It is something incredibly moving whenever I look at it.

Since I was elected I have worked with Northumberland domestic abuse services, which provide valuable support to some of the most vulnerable people across England’s most sparsely populated county. I have spoken to many people in this Chamber about the rural issues we face with addressing those unique challenges. The staff and volunteers at NDAS are truly some of the most inspirational people I have met in my short time in this House.

When I go out and visit schools across the constituency, whether in the more urbanised parts of the Tyne valley belt, or in the far-flung north or south of the constituency, one of the things that teachers express to me is a concern that male students are being bombarded with this toxic view of the world. I was born in 1991, and I consider myself to be relatively young. I grew up when Facebook was still a new thing, and for someone to get their first Facebook account they almost had to have a chat with their mum and dad about it to get their sign-off.

I was exposed to what we thought was an online revolution, but it was a drip feed compared to the tsunami that this generation are exposed to. For this generation to have been through the pandemic, and now to go through this, is incredibly concerning and shocking. It makes me realise how much the world has shifted under our feet in the decade and a half since I was in the education system.

Anna Dixon Portrait Anna Dixon
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Did my hon. Friend hear Gareth Southgate talking in the Richard Dimbleby lecture about the fact that boys need positive male role models in the real world—people like football coaches, scout leaders, youth club leaders and more male teachers? I wondered if my hon. Friend would agree that having real-world role models would help boys in the face of that tsunami of online abuse?

Joe Morris Portrait Joe Morris
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It will probably not surprise my hon. Friend to know that I have seen everything that Gareth Southgate has said since he left being England manager. My fiancée had to talk me into taking down a mocked-up Time “Man of the Year” Gareth Southgate work of art, shortly after she moved in—I think I am getting dragged slightly off course.

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Catherine McKinnell Portrait The Minister for School Standards (Catherine McKinnell)
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It is a pleasure to serve under you as Chair, Sir Jeremy. I congratulate the hon. Member for Epsom and Ewell (Helen Maguire) on securing this debate on relationship education in school, and I thank her for highlighting the vital role that education plays in preventing violence, including violence against women and girls. I know that she has fought long and hard for justice for victims of violence and domestic abuse, and that she recently spoke about these issues in this main Chamber. She stood alongside members of her community after the tragic murder of her constituents Emma and Lettie Pattison, and I take this opportunity to offer my sincere condolences to everyone affected by that.

As a schools Minister and a mum, I know it is vital that we reach children early, before harmful attitudes take root. The classroom must be a place where they learn the values of respect, equality and consent from the very start, and the aim of relationship education is to support all young people to build positive relationships and to keep themselves and others safe. That education must equip them for adult life, and to make a positive contribution to society. It really is a top priority for the Government, and it is central to our mission to make the country’s streets safer.

I want to get straight to the heart of the problem and acknowledge the important role of not only schools, but all services that support young people to thrive. The Government’s opportunity mission is dedicated to setting up every child with the best start in life, helping all children to achieve and thrive in school, and building skills that will allow young people to forge happy, healthy and fulfilling lives. “Opportunity”, “thriving”, “belonging” and “purpose” are not just nice words; they are the foundations of healthy individuals and a healthy society, and they are the best tools we have for helping young people to build healthy relationships and for combating violence and prejudice, including misogyny.

Misogyny is not innate. It is learned behaviour, which is why I agree that we must not talk as if boys and young men are the problem. The rise of misogynistic influencers online is a symptom of a number of wider issues that we must address. As part of this mission, we will equip our young people and children with the skills they need to form strong, positive relationships. We will support them to learn about kindness and respect. We will equip them to navigate a world in which 79% of young people have seen violent pornography before they turn 18, in which social media platforms routinely expose young people to misogynistic and violent content, and in which more and more of our social interactions are online. Our review of the statutory guidance for relationship, sex and health education has young people and their wellbeing at its heart, and we are working as quickly as we can to publish revised guidance as soon as possible this year.

We have spoken to teachers, experts and young people, and we are determined to harness their collective wisdom and change the conversation about relationships. Young people have told us that they want their relationship education to be interactive and participatory and to reflect the real complexities of building positive relationships. Experts have told us that they need support to help young people to develop the skills for healthy communication, empathy and emotional regulation. Telling young people about consent is not enough. Telling them about the law is not enough. Young people deserve better than that. They deserve to have teachers who will role-model honest and kind communication about sex, emotions, empathy and kindness.

Let us not pretend relationships are easy. Children need support, starting in early primary, to develop the skills they need for handling disappointment, for paying attention to the needs and boundaries of others and for understanding their own needs and feelings. In secondary schools, teachers must step up to the challenge of opening difficult conversations with their pupils. We know that many teachers already do that brilliantly.

Young people need to learn that romantic and sexual relationships are about care, kindness and generosity and about communication, listening and connection; they must also learn that pornography is not a true representation of sex. Our revised statutory guidance will ensure that relationships and sex education reflects the reality of young people today. Artificial intelligence, the dominance of social media, the availability of pornography and the rise in online misogyny—we cannot ignore the impacts of these trends on young people. Our revised statutory guidance for RSHE will be clear that teachers must be equipped to open conversations with boys and girls about what positive masculinity and femininity mean today and to help young people to develop positive role models that support their self-esteem and their sense of purpose.

Anna Dixon Portrait Anna Dixon
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Parents of LGBTQ+ children are concerned that the 2024 guidance that the previous Government consulted on is providing a hostile environment and preventing conversations about trans and non-binary children from happening. Would the Minister would consider reverting to the 2023 guidance?

Catherine McKinnell Portrait Catherine McKinnell
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We will publish our RSHE guidance as soon as possible, and it will be focused on keeping children’s wellbeing at its heart.

Education can support young people to develop positive attitudes towards people who are different from them and to exercise critical thinking when they encounter situations involving harmful behaviour and harmful sexual violence. These are conversations that we need to have collectively; without stigmatising boys or treating them as the problem, we must recognise that good relationship skills benefit everybody—boys and girls, men and women.

Our intention is that the revised guidance will spark a culture change in the delivery of RSHE and that it will signal our high aspirations for RSHE. We recognise that schools and teachers need support to have these conversations with young people, and we are exploring how best to provide that support in the current tight financial circumstances. That work is a central part of the Government’s ambition to halve violence against women and girls within a decade. We cannot achieve that without a significant culture change around equality and our conceptions of masculinity and femininity. Culture change goes beyond schools, but it can germinate from the ideas that children are exposed to in schools, the ways they learn to relate to those who are different from them and the sense of purpose and belonging that schools can provide.

I cannot emphasise how much I welcome the renewed focus on violence against women and girls following the release of the new Netflix drama “Adolescence”, which many Members mentioned. I am grateful to the hon. Member for Epsom and Ewell (Helen Maguire) for providing the opportunity to continue that conversation in this debate.

It is not a new issue for any of us. In 2020, Everyone’s Invited started to collect the testimonies of young people who had experienced sexual violence and sexual abuse, and in 2021, Ofsted published its review of sexual abuse in schools and colleges. Everyone’s Invited has shown us that rape culture and misogyny are increasingly appearing in primary schools, and we will publish a new tackling violence against women and girls strategy later this year, which will set out what further actions we will take as well as the progress that we have made so far.

Turning the tide on misogyny will not be a simple task, and we all need to keep talking about it. We need to keep learning, we need to keep challenging and we need to ensure that boys and young men remain part of that conversation.