Adoption

Debate between Caroline Dinenage and David Simpson

Wednesday 9th November 2011 Westminster Hall

[David Simpson (Upper Bann) (DUP)]

I am grateful for the opportunity to speak. I will be brief, because I know that right hon. and hon. Members want to contribute to this debate.

I congratulate the hon. Member for Erewash (Jessica Lee) on securing this debate on an issue that is very important to a lot of people out there among the general public who are interested in becoming prospective parents. They are interested in this debate, because the hon. Lady has expressed a lot of the frustration that many of them feel when they have to go through the process of adoption.

In the research papers that we received before this debate, one figure given to us was that last year, only 60 out of 3,600 children under the age of one who are in care were adopted, and in addition the average time that the process of adoption took was two and a half years. We all know that when a child reaches the age of four, the possibility of their being adopted is very slim indeed. They may go into foster care, but it is certainly very difficult for them to be adopted.

The research papers state that one in four adopted children were forced to wait more than a year before they moved in with their new parents. I have to say that my experience as someone who has adopted—I will go into that experience more in a moment—is in relation to the prospective parents: those couples who believe that they can offer a good home to children and who have tried for many years to have a family in a natural process but have never been able to do so. They are frustrated with the legislation on adoption. We have heard about the form-filling. In the words of people who have come to me, they are frustrated with “the intrusiveness” of having to sit down with social workers. The hon. Lady mentioned the good work of social services, and I accept that point, as being a social worker is a very difficult job. However, for older prospective parents aged between 30 and 35, having to sit down and talk to a young social worker who has very little experience of life and rearing a family—their experience all comes from a textbook—and tell them why they cannot have a family is very difficult. The prospective parents have to tell the social worker all their personal details and the process is very frustrating from their point of view.

There is a balance to be struck in all of this. I understand—and I am sure that all right hon. and hon. Members realise this—that some of the things that have happened to children over the years, and even in recent months, for example, baby P, children being starved to death and all those sorts of things, are horrific. In my opinion, anyone who does that sort of thing to a child is not fit to live in society.

[Caroline Dinenage (Gosport) (Con)]

The hon. Gentleman has raised the issues that people who want to adopt, or even foster, children are faced with. There is a myth that if someone is a smoker, or unmarried or even overweight, they will not be considered a suitable adoptive parent. Of course, many parents throughout the country face all those issues and it does not make them any better or any worse parents. We must also address the issue that people are expected to be paragons of virtue in everything that they do before they are regarded as perfect adoptive parents.

[David Simpson]

I agree wholeheartedly with the hon. Lady. Certainly, if being overweight had been an issue, I would not have fitted the bill. Later on this afternoon, my hon. Friend the Member for East Londonderry (Mr Campbell) will introduce a Westminster Hall debate on the Government policy on obesity, and he has dared me to attend. [Laughter.] I will go to it.

The hon. Member for Gosport (Caroline Dinenage) is right. No one is perfect and it is very hard to get a role model of a parent. We all have frustrations. Even if people have children through the natural process, they experience frustrations because they do not know how those children are going to turn out, which is difficult. The hon. Member for Devizes (Claire Perry) raised the issue of the age of prospective parents and I think that she said she is 47. May I say that she looks very well for 47? If I was a social worker, I would take her for 27, but we will not go down that road.

Returning to the serious point, it is nonsense for social services to restrict the number of prospective parents just because someone is over 40, or 45. That is absolutely scandalous. One of the prospective parents who had come to see me and who had been told that they could not adopt, was told that one reason was they were over 45, so when the child reached their teenage years the prospective father could not play football with them. That is absolute nonsense—the whole thing is crazy.

We must try to get a balance in all of this. In Northern Ireland 25 years ago, what my wife and I did was very new. We went to an agency, we went through missionaries, and we adopted our first child from India. That was 25 years ago this December. I think that we were the second set of parents in Northern Ireland to adopt a child from a foreign country. The reason was simple; it was because the waiting list to adopt a child in Northern Ireland was horrendous. It was unbelievable. We felt that we could give a child a home, and as we could not have that child from the British system, we were forced to go down another avenue.

We did that 25 years ago. We have had no problems whatsoever from a cultural or ethnic viewpoint, and we have experienced no racism in any way. My daughter is now 25 and she runs her own business. Then we adopted twins from Paraguay. At that time, the dictator in Paraguay made it very clear that he would prefer it if children died on the streets of Paraguay than be adopted by a western society. He did not have his way and we adopted the twins. Someone asked us after we did that if we were trying to start our own United Nations, but we decided to stop at just the three children because we knew that the United Nations was nothing to be proud of. We did not go down that road.

Our twins are now 22, and again that adoption has worked well; there are absolutely no issues. However, the point that I am making is that because of the system we were forced to go in that direction. The system needs to be looked at. Two and a half years is much too long for any prospective parent to wait for a child. We need to deal with that, and we must address the ageism involved in beliefs about the age a prospective parent should be.

SMEs (South of England)

Debate between Caroline Dinenage and David Simpson

Wednesday 15th June 2011 Westminster Hall

[Caroline Dinenage]

My hon. Friend makes an excellent point. It is worth noting that between 2007 and 2010 the south-east experienced the highest increase in deprivation in the UK. Will the Minister tell us what criteria the Government used in making the decision to exclude the south-east from NI relief? Government responses to that question usually state that the focus is to support areas that have traditionally relied more heavily on public sector employment, and they are usually thought to be the north and the midlands. That same description, however, could also be applied to a number of constituencies in the south, including mine. Furthermore, the exclusion of the south-east has a doubly negative effect on Gosport, as it creates a disincentive to business to choose to locate in the area—which should be a prime area for regeneration according to the Government’s own objectives—over more affluent areas of the north that are indiscriminately provided with Government support that they might neither need nor warrant.

[David Simpson (Upper Bann) (DUP)]

May I declare that I have an interest in the business sector in Northern Ireland? I congratulate the hon. Lady on securing this debate. Earlier in her speech, she mentioned banks and credit to small businesses, and I am sure she will share my concern about some of the findings of recent research papers on banks and the money being loaned to small businesses. The bankers have stated that they never promised to meet the Government targets; they say that they only promised to make the money available. Leading economists say nothing has changed in the manufacturing sector. In fact, over the past 12 months under this new Government, we have not seen any change from the banks, and small businesses, which are the backbone of the UK economy, are suffering greatly.

[Caroline Dinenage]

The hon. Gentleman makes a strong point. Yesterday, I met a small business owner in my constituency who is on the brink of losing his business and his house. Against a property that is worth £500,000, the bank will only lend him £50,000, which goes nowhere near far enough towards supporting him in trying to keep his business and his family together.

Although the Government clearly recognise that there are pockets of need in the south-east, it is thought to be extremely difficult to target national insurance investment at a sub-regional level. That may be the case, but such difficulties are not insurmountable. My constituents should not have to accept not receiving help they badly need purely because it is felt that giving them that help would be too difficult.

Military Covenant

Debate between Caroline Dinenage and David Simpson

Wednesday 16th February 2011 Commons Chamber

[Caroline Dinenage (Gosport) (Con)]

I pay tribute to the fantastic contributions that we have heard in the House today. In comparison, my speech will probably sound quite parochial, as I speak as a member of a forces family: my husband is a Royal Navy officer, so perhaps I should declare an interest as I am one of the people under discussion.

We have heard comments about political point scoring and making promises that we cannot keep, and those are the two issues on which I want to focus. The armed forces is not a homogenous mass or fighting machine, but soldiers, sailors, airmen, wives, husbands, kids, mothers and fathers. We are asking people not just to lay down their own lives but to lay down the lives of those whom they love most in the world, to protect our country and its interests. We must remember, every day in this Chamber, that those are the decisions that we are making.

I fully endorse the renaming of the military covenant as an armed forces covenant. The many Navy members of my constituency—it is a military constituency—have often felt that “the military covenant” is an Army-centric term, and they like the fact that the Navy and RAF are included in the rebranding of the name.

I want to reinforce the point made by some of my hon. Friends this afternoon that it is missing the point and the sentiment behind the covenant to talk about enshrining it in law. Forces families have heard it all before—[Interruption.] Hon. Members can chunter all they like, but I can talk only from personal experience. Successive Governments have promised to take care of the armed forces and failed to deliver.

Forces families do not want special treatment. They just want a level playing field; they want the same treatment as everybody else and the same opportunities as non-service families. Sadly, forces families are no strangers to having their hopes raised and then dashed. For example, MODern Housing Solutions offered itself as a revolution in delivering maintenance and repairs for forces accommodation. Everybody in married forces was very excited about that, but it failed to deliver its promises.

When I was newly wed to a naval officer, I was told by the wife of a more senior officer that the only thing I could guarantee in my life as a Navy wife was that the day my husband told me he would be home from sea is the only day he would not be home. That sums up the situation. Such changes of plan are unavoidable of course, but the MOD must work on its communication skills. Families can often be seen as a bit of a nuisance, and they are often the last to find out when their loved ones will be home.

[David Simpson (Upper Bann) (DUP)]

Will the hon. Lady give way?

[Caroline Dinenage]

I would love to give way, but I will not do so as I am also thinking about other Members who wish to contribute.

An unhappy family makes an unhappy service person. We need to rebuild the trust of our armed forces, and if we make a promise we must stick to it. Making promises that are achievable and then exceeding expectations is far better than seeking to enshrine things in law.

The UK’s armed forces have been working at a sustained rate for decades. Whitehall is lined with statues commemorating the valour of servicemen and women, but what would be a far more fitting commemoration in their honour is a tangible covenant that can respond to the changing needs of our armed forces and that keeps its promises to them and makes them feel safer abroad and more valued at home.