Domestic Abuse

Lord Farmer Excerpts

Thursday 22nd March 2018 Lords Chamber

[Lord Farmer (Con)]

My Lords, it is a great honour to follow the noble Lord, Lord Bird, with his always stimulating, fresh-thinking and original approach to this subject. I also congratulate the noble Baroness, Lady Lister, on securing this debate. There is much to welcome in the Government’s plan to transform the national response to domestic abuse, in particular their emphasis on prevention.

My main point, which I will illustrate with emerging good practice, is that when couples and their children affected by domestic abuse receive the right support at the right time, this can prevent further abuse—this really follows on from what the noble Lord, Lord Bird, said. We need a much greater emphasis on working with abusive men and motivating them to change their behaviour. This can even enable some couples and their families to stay together safely—for these units to be survivors, as it were.

I know that men, too, can be victims, and I am glad that the government consultation acknowledges this, but I will focus on male-to-female violence. As we have heard, the organisation SafeLives, which provided much helpful data for my speech, found that 95% of victims are women and 95% of perpetrators are men. There is never any excuse for domestic abuse and its gravity should never be downplayed to keep families together—but neither should we forget that, while victims invariably want the violence to stop, many want the relationship with the perpetrator to continue.

The presence of children can influence this. After physical separation, a child’s father still exists in her mind and she often has unresolved and mixed emotions. Confused impressions of him affect her other relationships. Children often live in the hope that one day they will have a caring relationship with their father. Perhaps counterintuitively, Stover et al’s research found that, on average, pre-school children fare worse the less they see their father after domestic abuse. They are more depressed, anxious and aggressive. Poignantly, 67% of female survivors maintain contact with the perpetrator for the sake of their children.

Responding to the uncomfortable truth that around 30% of domestic abuse begins during pregnancy, the philanthropic Stefanou Foundation developed “For Baby’s Sake”. This whole-family change programme works with expectant mothers and fathers as co-parents, whether or not they are together. The team helps them end the abuse, overcome its impact and nurture their baby’s and other children’s development. The rollout of two prototype projects in Hertfordshire and the west London tri-borough is being evaluated by King’s College London, with highly promising interim findings. This is a great example of philanthropy, not government, taking the lead, although I am encouraged that the Government have funded a pilot of the SafeLives “One Front Door” model in seven areas across the UK. Instead of treating all family members as separate individuals, a whole-family approach looks at the risks faced by them all and works across the family unit to enable them to move on safely.

The Government consultation also mentions that South Wales Police and Welsh Women’s Aid are piloting the Change that Lasts model. I have previously mentioned to your Lordships my respect for Safety in the Vale, formerly Glamorgan Women’s Aid. It has done much pioneering work with families at medium to low risk, taking a restorative family approach while making safety the top consideration. It has helped two-thirds of families to stay together safely by meeting the needs of the women, children and men involved. We know that children are profoundly affected by living in such households: they are traumatised, which affects their mental health and their ability to do well at school. If they see only a model of deeply unhealthy behaviour, where violence is a prominent ingredient, their peer and future partnering relationships will inevitably suffer. Childhood exposure to domestic violence is one of the most powerful predictors of both perpetrating and receiving domestic abuse as an adult.

Whole-family approaches ensure that we do not forget the need to help perpetrators change their behaviour. The founder of SafeLives, Diana Barran, emphasises prioritising what we would want for our best friend if she were being abused: she should be able to stay safely in her home and community instead of having to flee. The perpetrator should be challenged to change and held to account, switching the narrative away from, “Why doesn’t she leave him?” to “Why doesn’t he stop?” Research shows that some perpetrators have as many as six different victims, but fewer than 1% receive any specialist help. Much more needs to be done to deal with this problem at source. What are the Government doing to ensure a significant expansion of evidence-based perpetrator programmes?

We also need to prevent abuse from happening in the first place. Identification of cases is much improved but prevalence is little changed. Clearly, our response, both as a society and from the Government, does need to be transformed. A significant minority still exists who view violence from male to female partners as acceptable.

Social marketing is vital. Hull’s “Strength to Change” campaign, informed by research from the University of Central Lancashire, makes men aware of how heinous their violence is to their partners and children. It pushes them towards help that holds them to a high standard of accountability and ensures that health and other professionals know where to refer men who are desperate to change. Are the Government supporting awareness programmes that do not just make disclosure easier but starkly bring home to men that violence is never acceptable and that they can and must access non-stigmatising help?