Domestic Violence

Debate between Stephen Pound and Julie Hilling

Tuesday 11th September 2012 Westminster Hall

[Stephen Pound]

May I say categorically, on the record, that I have immense respect for the hon. Gentleman? I have enjoyed many conversations with him, and I am grateful that he has joined us in the House. I certainly did not, at any stage, mean to imply any criticism; we are as one here. We look to the Minister’s febrile mind to come up with an alternative wording, in the sure and certain knowledge that he is the person who can achieve that.

[Julie Hilling]

My hon. Friend said that he thought that we were now in more enlightened times. I do not know whether he has seen the statistics from a Department of Health survey that say that 43% of teenage girls believe that it is acceptable for a boyfriend to be aggressive towards his partner, and that one in two boys and one in three girls believe that there are some circumstances in which it is okay to hit a woman or to force her to have sex. We have not moved greatly from those unenlightened times. Perhaps the only difference is that there were few resources to support women who were fleeing domestic violence. Sadly, we seem to be going back to the time when there were fewer resources to support women. Fundamentally, attitudes such as how men view women and how women view themselves regarding domestic violence have not changed.

[Stephen Pound]

Dr Pangloss has never been my role model on such occasions. I do not see that we inhabit the best of all possible worlds. Believe you me, I am more than well aware of the fact that we have not remotely resolved the problem, but there has been an attitudinal change in society to a slight degree; it is not sufficient, but it is there. It is simply not acceptable nowadays to perpetrate the sort of behaviour that was the norm when I was in my 20s in west London.

Some 30 years ago, Erin Pizzey started the Chiswick women’s refuge. I remember going there on Christmas eve year after year with toys that we had collected for the children. It was explained that Pizzey, who was sometimes robust in her attitudes and was impatient—for sound reasons—would always insist on having no man within less than 20 feet of the building. We would therefore leave our sacks of toys 20 feet from Kew bridge for people to come out to collect. That was an improvement.

For me, as someone who has represented my area for 30 years, the biggest issue that we need to address today is not the existence of the problem, which is undeniable, or the need for early, positive and preventive intervention—I hope that my hon. Friend the Member for Bolton West (Julie Hilling) and the Minister will accept that, and we will return to that issue in a minute—but one particular aspect of the horrific nightmare of domestic violence: housing.

At the moment, I posit that every one of us is regularly confronted in our surgeries by victims of the foulest domestic violence who look to be re-housed as a solution to their problem. It is somehow felt that if they could move to another place or property, the problem would be solved. In London, that simply is not possible for two reasons. First, in my borough, there are 23,000 people on the waiting list. Secondly, my constituency is minute geographically. Someone could move from one side to the other and still be within a half-hour walk. If someone moves to other accommodation, do the children get uprooted and sent to a new school? Do they go anonymously to that school? Do people change their general practitioner, their sons’ football classes and their daughters’ dance classes? Do all those things have to change overnight? It simply is not possible.

That is why when people say—I have heard some say this—that domestic violence is exaggerated as a mechanism for accelerated movement through the housing transfer list, I find it intensely and immensely offensive. I also find it utterly unrealistic. In all honesty, there is no surplus of housing in the urban environment waiting for people to move into. I speak as someone who has spent many years working for a housing association in west London. One of my jobs was to facilitate such overnight—sometimes middle-of-a-Sunday-afternoon—transfers. Until the day I die, I will never forget the piles of school paintings, drawings and textbooks that were left behind by children whose mother never thought that they would go to that school again, because they moved on to another school in another part of west London, thinking that that would solve the problem. Did it solve the problem? Sadly, it did not, because the abusive partner saw such a move as a challenge, lay in wait outside each primary school, eventually located the mother and the problem started all over again.

There is one ray of sunshine. There is an organisation called the Place to Be, which some hon. Members may be aware of, that operates principally in primary schools. In my part of the world—west London—it provides a quiet place for children to talk to a skilled, trained mentor, who can actually talk through the problems that they face. Children will put a little note in a box, just like the bullying boxes that many schools have nowadays. More than anything else, we have found that little notes appear that say, “Please ask my Mummy’s boyfriend to stop hitting her”, and those are the mild ones. We see that over and over again.

The solution is not the refuge or the move, or somehow to seek to resolve the issue geographically, by transferring across the city. It is not somehow to blame the victim and say that the victim has to move; we have to look for preventive interventions for perpetrators and for early signposting. Unfortunately, like many in this room, I have had to speak to abusers. We have to do so; we cannot refuse to see them, although we might find that difficult and have to hold our noses. I have often been struck by the frustration evidenced by them—the low self-value and self-worth, and the failure to achieve anything in life. Very often, such people are like the father in the famous story in James Joyce’s “Dubliners”, who comes home and beats up his children because he has failed at work, does not have enough money and has failed in everything he does, and there is the agony of that boy who says:

“Don’t beat me, pa!... I’ll say a Hail Mary for you.”

It is very often like that—the frustration boils out from the parent who comes home, where the nearest person to hand is the child, the wife, the partner or the spouse.

We have to identify such violence early on, because I think that we can save some of those people. Yes, it is paramount that we save the victims and it is crucial that we save the collateral victims—the children and the people around them—but, in some cases, we also have to consider intervening on the person causing the problem. That may sound heretical, and it is much easier for people to switch off their minds and read the Daily Mail, or to demonise this great tattooed chav underclass who come home and bat their wives around, but there is much more to the problem than that. They make up a range of victims in their own different ways. I carry no candle for the abuser, but I recognise that intervention has to be across the piece.

Inevitably, everything that we do in politics in this place today is about resources and priorities. Nye Bevan was so right so many years ago when he said that the language of socialism is a language of priorities: we are in that world now. However, this priority has to be given full support and strength, because if we cannot provide preventive intervention and early identification, the problems that come over the hill will frankly be so vast that they will dwarf any demand or draw-down on the public purse now. I appreciate that such an argument may be made about many issues, but in the case of domestic violence, the argument makes itself.

Not only is there the corrosive, damaging and very often lethal impact on the victims and their immediate family, but, as has already been mentioned—I think by the hon. Member for Blackpool North and Cleveleys (Paul Maynard)—such violence becomes a learned practice. I have seen children in the playground of a primary school hit girls, emulating their father’s or their mother’s boyfriend’s behaviour, which is a learned behaviour. I have seen young boys, at the age of six or seven, hit young girls, because they have seen such behaviour and they think that it is acceptable. That is a cost on society that we cannot afford.

NHS Care of Older People

Debate between Stephen Pound and Julie Hilling

Thursday 27th October 2011 Westminster Hall

[Julie Hilling (Bolton West) (Lab)]

It is a pleasure to serve under your chairmanship, Mrs Brooke. I congratulate the hon. Member for Stourbridge (Margot James) on securing this important and timely debate. I beg your indulgence as I tell a personal story about my mum’s recent journey through the national health service. As many colleagues will know, my mum had a bad stroke in June this year, and we have had a bumpy ride over the past four months. I want to make it clear at the outset that the vast majority of care workers, nurses, doctors and other staff with whom we have come into contact have shown my mum a great deal of loving care, but she seems to have been let down by system failures.

Mum is 86, but before her stroke, she was still working, teaching three yoga classes a week, doing reflexology, driving her car and leading a totally full life. As hon. Members can imagine, it has been devastating not only for her but for all of us. After the stroke, she was first admitted to Luton and Dunstable hospital’s accident and emergency department. At about 4 in the morning, she was medically ready to be transferred to a ward and was taken up to the stroke ward. However, when we got there, we were told that there was no bed. We were not too fazed at that point—it was the middle of the night—so we accepted it, and she was transferred back to the emergency admissions ward. At the time, the medics were not sure that Mum would survive, so it was a difficult time for us.

By the following afternoon, we were getting agitated—[Interruption.] Excuse me, Mrs Brooke; you can tell how it made me feel. Anybody’s journey through the national health services in such circumstances is difficult, and ours has not been made better by what has happened to us. We were agitated by the following afternoon. Mum was still on the emergency ward, which was very busy and noisy. Eventually, we started the journey back to the stroke ward, to be greeted at the desk again with “Sorry, there’s no room.” At that point, I started to become six foot tall, thinking, “My mother is going to come into your ward.” Fortunately, a sister behind the desk treated us nicely, saying, “This woman will be admitted on to our ward.”

Some time later, concerned about her breathing, I called for a nurse. The nurse came in and said, “Well, you know she’s do not resuscitate, don’t you?” I said, “Yes, but I’m concerned about her breathing.” The nurse said, “Oh no, she’s fine. She’s actually in a deep sleep and things are good, but oh dear, I’ve not hung up the drip.” I spent the next half-hour holding up the drip so that Mum would get saline and holding Mum’s hand until the nurse eventually returned with the drip stand.

That is just the start of a chapter of system failure. It was a great frustration going to the desk and seeing all those people behind it, but being totally ignored. I did not know whether they were physiotherapists or doctors. When I said, “Mum needs the commode,” or “Please can you,” I was ignored. That was not just our experience but the experience of everybody on the ward.

[Stephen Pound (Ealing North) (Lab)]

Sorry, but I cannot believe I heard that. Can my hon. Friend confirm that the charge nurse said to the patient’s daughter that the patient was do not resuscitate? Please God, I heard that wrong.